I loved this story she shared on her private blog about an experience with her daughters Emma and Leah, and asked her permission to share it here. It captures so beautifully one of the things I love the most about this sacred responsibility called motherhood. Enjoy!
My dearest Emmy Shnap,
Did you know that important things can happen while you are sleeping? Earth altering, heart shaping things? And sometimes very good things come from tears.
The other night you were lying on my bed. You reached and stretched up with your soft little hand and somehow got your finger stuck in a metal part of our 3 hole punch. You screamed in alarm and pain. Your alarm and panic changed into mine as I realized that it really was stuck. I frantically called for your daddy and he came running, followed by Hyrum, Leah, Mary Kate, and Eliza. By the time everyone was in the room, we had your finger out. The skin was intact and it looked like it would be ok, but this....this was a first for you. Real pain. Searing pain that won't go away and mommy couldn't make it better. You cried with all your might. Your face was blotched and purple and betrayed!
Well, did you know that compassionate hearts connect with hearts in pain? When Leah heard you scream nothing would have stopped her from getting to you. When she rushed in and her face was blotched and purple and betrayed!
"Ohhhhhh.....Eeeemmmmaaaa! Ohhhh Hoooonnnnneeeeeeeeey!!!....Oh....Oh.....Oh....Is she bleeding???? Is she o.k.????? In that instant you knew that she knew. She understood! She felt your pain! And instead of staying with mommy, you reached out your chubby little arms to that little big sister of yours in her princess nightgown. You wrapped your arms around her neck, and rested your soft cheek there. And then, in an instant..... you were asleep. Asleep!!! You had spent every bit of emotional reserve and you were gone. Just...like...that. Softly breathing in and out....on Leah's neck.
Well, did you know that dreams come true? And sometimes, even at bedtime! Your eyes were closed, but Leah's were wide-eyed open. Her face was full of joyous surprise! You had wanted her, chosen her over mommy and daddy! You had given her your confidence and your heart and she knew it. I'm sure that if she hadn't felt so protective, she would have melted on the spot! But, she was in mommy mode. Radiant and beautiful! And you...you had chosen her! And even sisters who are 12 months old can move mountains.
After that, Leah rocked you on Hagrid's chair for an hour. She wore a soft smile deep and glowing. She traced your cheeks. She studied your nose. She cherished your chubbiness. She grew. She changed while you slept there.
You're eyes were closed, but Leah's were
And so were mine.